Maybe the defense for Sacramento’s Grant High had a reason for staying away from Ryan Robards.
The Elk Grove (Calif.) senior stayed upright after upchucking long enough to score all six of his team’s touchdowns during a 42-7 victory on Friday. We’ll let him explain, as he did to the Sacramento Bee.
“I did what I could. I was throwing up beforehand, all over my pants here, so maybe I need to do it before every game. We had to come out fast and physical, and we did.”
Geez, opponents have a hard enough time tackling Robards. The eau de vomit doesn’t help matters.
According to the Bee’s Joe Davidson, the 5-foot-11, 190-pound senior running back and defensive back scored on a 70-yard interception return, a 4-yard scamper, a 10-yard fumble return, a 75-yard punt return and a 62-yard rush — and that was all in the opening two quarters.
That’s right: Robards scored five first-half touchdowns in four different fashions, and not one of them was a heave. He added a 1-yard touchdown in the third quarter to finish with 324 all-purpose yards and six scores on the night.
Through five games for the unbeaten Thundering Herd (more like Thundering Hurl), Robards now has 1,316 all-purpose yards and 19 touchdowns, including a TD reception, according to MaxPreps.
Afterwards, Grant coach Mike Alberghni’s offered this amazing response to the Bee: “You can only yell and scream at the half so many times.”
Earlier in the evening, Robards was spewing something other than venom, but it was his opponents who were warming up the porcelain bus by halftime.